As I said last year.

I enjoyed going back and reading my post from this day last year. The coldest December I can ever remember, December 2012.

But now today, on December thirty-first 2013, things are a little different — It id the very last day I will ever spend in 2013. It’s over guys, and I’d like to officially declare this year:

tumblr_mnk2qwqhg01qhmhdfo1_500
The astounding year of firsts
On firsts
On firsts
On firsts

I’m living the 20’s life! The life of constant excitement and entertainment! There is rarely a dull moment, and even those dull moments are simply considered peaceful, beautiful, and full of blessings.
My post last year was so full of heart ache and anger, yet I was proud of the changes I had made, yet it was quiet obvious that I wasn’t happy with those changes.
But hot damn look at me now!
God is a strategic God, you must never forget that, no matter how long and bumpy the ride gets.
This year I have chosen to forget the grudges and heartache that I found myself dealing with in the past. You may wonder, “How can you forget something that’s happened to you?” But one definition of the word forget is to disregard intentionally or to overlook.
In other words, you have to choose to disregard your nasty past so that it doesn’t keep you from moving forward. That means the good and the bad. Sometimes our past victories keep us from rising higher as much as past failures.
If we don’t let go of the old, we’ll never be able to embrace the new.
It doesn’t matter what’s happened in your history, it’s time to forget what lies behind.

Today is the perfect day to make the choice to live forward. Trust that God has a better future in store for you. Trust that He’s working behind the scenes on your behalf. As you forget what lies behind and press forward, you’ll move forward. You’ll see increase and blessing and live the abundant life He has in store for you!

Twenty Two Years Not Dead.

Today is my twenty second Birthday.

My twenty second year corrupting this galaxy with my loud obnoxious lingo, and outrageous acts of weirdom. In these twenty two years I have found myself associated with some of the most extraordinary situations, and interesting people.
20130803-104810.jpg
If you know me, and listen to my story, you know that my life has been one lucky toss of the dice after another.
Constant blessings.
For most if my life I’ve considered myself to be one of the most blessed and lucky girls ever to walk this crazy weird planet. And to put it bluntly, this past two months have been the most exciting and entertaining of them all.
Everything has fallen into place so perfectly for so long, that I’ve found myself bracing for impact from some type of future oncoming Borge ship of bad news.
Am I seriously waiting for something bad to happen? That makes no sense.

Last week, one of my friends was diagnosed with cancer. I’ve spent a good portion of time with him in the past two days, and it’s really inspired me concerning the type of person I am, compared to most of our human race.
This man is 25 years old, and was told that he could die in 1, 5, 10 years- they truly don’t know. That’s usually how cancer works.

20130803-002613.jpg
But isn’t that how life is anyway?
Aren’t we just as unsure when our time is up when we are healthy, as we are if we’re diagnosed with a terminal illness?
Why is it that it takes a person telling us that we will be dying at some point in our life, that be begin to actually feel like we should be living our life?
Does that make any sense? No.

I can’t stand how some people approach life. As if movies and videogames will fill the void enough to pass the time, rather than going out and meeting and living and not just simply existing.
Some people disgust me. But we’ll get into that later.

Home is where the bullshit is.

For a substantial number of years, I have been living out of my car, or a suitcase, or on a couch, or in someones spare bedroom. For the majority of my adult life, I have chose to live in these conditions. I have never minded it, no matter how sad it sounds.

I’ve just always been running away.tumblr_mnerwn17OQ1qk1jiqo1_500
Driving away.
Putting more distance between me and my emotional tie I had with a man.
Constantly on the running from a relationship I ended.
Why am I like this? Why do I love to run away? I can honestly say I don’t even understand my own reasoning.

I moved out of my parents house when I was 17 years old, and since then I haven’t managed to spent more than 11 months in one place. Even the last home I lived in, where I was suppose to let myself settle and make a life in, I had to force myself to hang things up and try and get comfortable, because I knew I wouldn’t be there long.

Home is where the heart is. Home is wherever I’m with you. This is a house, not a home.

Do you know how many times I’ve fed those lines? How many times I’ve NOT felt at home. It’s unbelievable that at 21 years old, I am still living out of a suitcase and boxes…

… and I’m not on tour.