It’s very difficult to go back and read my old posts.
Since I had started this blog, I have been sliding deeper into a wormhole of mood swings, depression, self loathing, and all around mental instability.
I have never been like this. Not for this long. Of course like every woman in the world, I’ll go through stages (usually lasting a week at a time) of unhappiness, but when in lasts more than a couple months.. changes need to be made.
I don’t sleep.
I don’t eat.
I don’t put my whole heart into anything anymore, because I know I will be mocked for doing so.
I have never felt so lonely. I just want to run. I want to run as far away as my money will take me.
I would be leaving nothing behind.